tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post8540005084961881525..comments2024-01-31T20:47:28.121-08:00Comments on The Playroom: Using BDSM to Heal Past AbuseUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger71125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-49769330120897857452012-10-17T10:36:39.264-07:002012-10-17T10:36:39.264-07:00I was reading the little bit you have posted here ...I was reading the little bit you have posted here for your story Nobodys perfect and I too have a lot of triggers but I was so intrigued to see if he can heal her. I dont like to read any kind of sharing so I hope this story is not about that.LuvRPatz4everhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04551788055173830758noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-76996739023840520902012-08-28T01:53:40.811-07:002012-08-28T01:53:40.811-07:00Dear Kallypso,
I'm very sorry to hear about t...Dear Kallypso,<br /><br />I'm very sorry to hear about the awful things that were done to you, and I have huge respect for your ability to face them so head-on! I'd also like to say that the potential for BDSM to be a factor in personal healing goes beyond the heterosexual male-dominant female-submissive dynamic in which it is the submissive female who has a history of abuse. I'm an active member of my local BDSM community, and I've met more people than I like to think about who have histories of sexual trauma and who have found that BDSM can be part of the healing process in many different ways. Often this involves reenacting (either as the perpetrator or as a version of their earlier selves) the original trauma. Some people doing this in the context of a dominant/submissive relationship, in which a submissive partner cedes authority to the dominant partner to making decisions for both parties (within agreed-upon limits) understanding that the dominant, the submissive or both may be processing trauma. For others it happens in the context of a top/bottom encounter (in which neither partner cedes authority to the other - but one partner will typically be delivering sensation and the other receiving), or with multiple people in either/each role. The partners in question may have a romantic relationship or relationship cluster or they may be trusted friends or chosen family. Last, but not least, the people involved can have any gender identity or orientation. BDSM is an incredibly versatile constellation of practices, and there's plenty of room for it to play all kinds of different roles in people's lives, relationships, and healing.<br /><br />All that said, a quote that encapsulates something that I've heard from every person with whom I've talked about this topic is that, "BDSM is therapeutic, but it isn't therapy." If someone is dealing with this kind of trauma, a certain minimal level of processing often, if not always, needs to happen before BDSM can be a tool for healing instead of for self-destruction. I strongly encourage anyone who is interested in using BDSM this way to find themselves a Kink-Aware therapist (for an excellent listing of Kink-Aware Professionals of all varieties see the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom's list at https://ncsfreedom.org/resources/kink-aware-professionals-directory/kap-directory-homepage.html ).<br /><br />All my best,<br />AAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-82520075808259768612012-08-03T09:44:44.030-07:002012-08-03T09:44:44.030-07:00Congrats, Suzanne! Thanks, everyone, for the comme...Congrats, Suzanne! Thanks, everyone, for the comments!<br /><br />KallyKallypso Mastershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15006389527038649254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-17940160187415553622012-08-03T09:43:54.580-07:002012-08-03T09:43:54.580-07:00Brandy, much of mine happened when I was too young...Brandy, much of mine happened when I was too young, too. My older sisters filled me in on some and then I will get little flashbacks that just tell me where I am and what position I'm in, but nothing more. It's disconcerting and I'll admit that, while writing this book I often just tamped the memories back down when I felt they wanted to surface. I really don't want to know. <br /><br />Hugs to you for being a survivor. <br /><br />KallyKallypso Mastershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15006389527038649254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-61045705145325034882012-07-24T13:28:21.514-07:002012-07-24T13:28:21.514-07:00Using random.org I have chosen a winner for the Ka...Using random.org I have chosen a winner for the Kallypso Masters prize pack.<br /><br />Congratulations to...<br /><br />Suzanne<br />suzyrph@charter.net<br /><br />I have emailed you so please look for that. If you did not recieve an email please email me at assistant @ kallypsomasters . com (no spaces) <br /><br />ThanksLeagh - Kallypso's Assistantnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-1994406598335578712012-07-24T10:20:46.866-07:002012-07-24T10:20:46.866-07:00Great info in that one! I cant wait to read the st...Great info in that one! I cant wait to read the story! I as well as MANY have had to deal with issues that are some what similar. Although I am one of the "lucky" ones I guess some would say since I dont remember most of the things that happened to me. so I understand the need for pain to just FEEL! <br /><br />Brandy<br />lovinmybooks@gmail.comBrandy https://www.blogger.com/profile/09576938941894849609noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-44439909474195670252012-07-21T22:56:56.937-07:002012-07-21T22:56:56.937-07:00Great, great post, I hope it hopes that need it an...Great, great post, I hope it hopes that need it and may make some of those that need to give voice to what happened to them finally come out. I look forward to it, I know it will be emotional and I am ready for it!<br /><br />Eva<br />evitap67(at)gmail(dot)comEva's Flowershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07336001176271662636noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-57078587967407095522012-07-21T22:26:17.915-07:002012-07-21T22:26:17.915-07:00Contact Leagh, my PA, at assistant@kallypsomasters...Contact Leagh, my PA, at assistant@kallypsomasters.com and ask her to put you on the list for the mailing this fall. I need to get through one more convention, then we'll mail out some of what's left. If you want extras to hand out to family, bookstores, book clubs, etc., then let her know and she can put you on the Kallypso's Street Brats street team. <br /><br />I'll definitely be back in Colorado next year. Loved it!<br /><br />KallyKallypso Mastershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15006389527038649254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-39430534217297328682012-07-21T22:24:02.171-07:002012-07-21T22:24:02.171-07:00ALWAYS with the right person! It's encouraging...ALWAYS with the right person! It's encouraging to hear from so many readers who have found this to be true in their lives. <br /><br />Hugs,<br /><br />KallyKallypso Mastershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15006389527038649254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-57068507302529370512012-07-21T22:22:46.823-07:002012-07-21T22:22:46.823-07:00Wow, Jennifer! I can't imagine. There is an in...Wow, Jennifer! I can't imagine. There is an interesting scene in the book where Adam is explaining to Savi how the brain processes pain. Not sure it will help, but it was interesting when I read it described that way in one of my resources. <br /><br />All the best. <br /><br />KallyKallypso Mastershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15006389527038649254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-77423296935382328112012-07-21T22:19:50.429-07:002012-07-21T22:19:50.429-07:00Jen, if you bought the first one, then you don'...Jen, if you bought the first one, then you don't have the latest version. A reader of mine who served in the Marines 22 years went over it and helped tweak some things to make it even better. You might want to delete the old one and download the new. (It's at Amazon, B&N, Smashwords, and All Romance eBooks.)<br /><br />Thanks!<br /><br />KallyKallypso Mastershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15006389527038649254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-37957910857806175082012-07-21T22:18:10.196-07:002012-07-21T22:18:10.196-07:00Ugh. I hate the mommy porn term, although I know i...Ugh. I hate the mommy porn term, although I know it's used more with Fifty Shades than my type of books. <br /><br />I like reading (and writing!) about characters going through tough emotional times and having to deal with real problems in life. And I like writing Romance because I know (and my readers know) that there WILL be a happy ending. In mine, that might not mean all the problems have been worked out, but at least they'll be committed to working on them together. <br /><br />Of course, I have a number of male fans/readers, too, especially among the military. :)<br /><br />KallyKallypso Mastershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15006389527038649254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-80903439644766697452012-07-21T22:02:56.366-07:002012-07-21T22:02:56.366-07:00Erzabet, hugs on your traumatic past. There's ...Erzabet, hugs on your traumatic past. There's just so much abuse and violence. A number of my characters in this series are dealing with various forms, including the heroine in the next book (Cassie in Nobody's Dream). <br /><br />I encourage you to read the series in order so that it will make sense. The introduction, Masters at Arms (which is free), is a must. But Nobody's Angel #2 will be necessary to understand the subplot with Marc and Angelina in Nobody's Perfect. You would also benefit from reading Nobody's Hero (book 3), where Damian and Savi first come together again after eight years apart. Scenes in that book show Savi that it is possible for her to begin to trust Damian. And the Epilogue in that book has the first scene in chapter one of Nobody's Perfect, as well, only in Hero it's told from Damian's perspective and in Perfect from Savi's. <br /><br />I don't write standalone novels. One reader described my series as one long book, told in installments. I like cliffhangers, story lines (including the romance) that continue from book to book, and this group of people are a BDSM Community and like family to each other. Luckily, I don't charge more than $3.99 for a book!<br /><br />KallyKallypso Mastershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15006389527038649254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-82835291672865226342012-07-21T21:54:15.843-07:002012-07-21T21:54:15.843-07:00FetLife is great, although I mostly use it for res...FetLife is great, although I mostly use it for research (great and informative forums!) and to find people to ask questions of. <br /><br />Thanks so much!<br /><br />KallyKallypso Mastershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15006389527038649254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-7339339395697636082012-07-21T21:52:42.320-07:002012-07-21T21:52:42.320-07:00Thanks, Basia! I think that's the main reason ...Thanks, Basia! I think that's the main reason I don't plan to read Fifty Shades. Of course, this book was in my head long before Fifty was a blip on the charts. I always knew that I would show the BDSM community in a positive light, because the people I have met who are in the lifestyle are some of the most supportive, positive, helpful people I've ever known. I don't like that BDSM is vilified there, although there are horror stories in that community, just like any others. I guess she chose to focus on those.Kallypso Mastershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15006389527038649254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-37249820115963898132012-07-21T21:46:25.280-07:002012-07-21T21:46:25.280-07:00Oh, Becki, Savi has some of the same tapes. Damian...Oh, Becki, Savi has some of the same tapes. Damian is very creative as he begins to work on erasing those tapes and redirecting those thoughts (as you can see in the above excerpt). OMG, wait till the...well, I won't say, but there are some powerful, powerful scenes in the book. Take as long as you need to read it! It'll be a while before the next one, anyway!<br /><br />Hugs,<br /><br />KallyKallypso Mastershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15006389527038649254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-27170687148348019062012-07-21T20:50:26.418-07:002012-07-21T20:50:26.418-07:00Great excerpt, thank you!
pennykathleen28(at)gmai...Great excerpt, thank you!<br /><br />pennykathleen28(at)gmail(dot)comAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-17047269846946694712012-07-21T08:25:13.266-07:002012-07-21T08:25:13.266-07:00I know this is late but I just want to say that I ...I know this is late but I just want to say that I love the post. I can't wait to read Damian and Savi's story.<br />suz2(at)cox(dot)netSusan W.noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-38582568134370150132012-07-20T21:31:13.176-07:002012-07-20T21:31:13.176-07:00Kelly, thanks for another great post. Your books j...Kelly, thanks for another great post. Your books just keep getting better and better. I'm sorry I wasn't able to make the dinner in Denver. I'd love some swag! <br />Lisaguertin at yahoo dot com <br />LisaLisa Ghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07598979639325922061noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-30546597388167858502012-07-20T19:48:20.284-07:002012-07-20T19:48:20.284-07:00Kally, great post. I experienced MST and have fou...Kally, great post. I experienced MST and have found that BDSM can help in some areas with the right person. Thanks for the chance to win. <br />Patricia<br />panthers.ravens@yahoo dot comAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-15735976701425586992012-07-20T12:47:56.283-07:002012-07-20T12:47:56.283-07:00I have a disease where my nerves interpret every i...I have a disease where my nerves interpret every input as pain so I am intrigued to read about Sivi who cannot feel pain. Can't wait to read the book.<br />Jenniferredwing@gmail.comJenniferredwinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14233262646050110504noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-31996062897153461752012-07-20T10:58:25.736-07:002012-07-20T10:58:25.736-07:00I have heard your series is awesome!! I have bough...I have heard your series is awesome!! I have bought your first book and am very excited to read it! Now hearing about "Nobody's Perfect" I'm thinking your books are gonna get bumped up on my TBR pile!!LOL<br /><br />lennifer@telus.netJen Bergnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-80085582592950729302012-07-20T08:29:24.022-07:002012-07-20T08:29:24.022-07:00My husband laughs at me cause he says I sit around...My husband laughs at me cause he says I sit around the house and read mommy porn all day but what he doesn't realize is that it helps me to see a different way of life. I enjoy feeling like I'm transported to another world seeing various characters and how they deal with their problems. Yes I do enjoy the more risky topics at times, but I feel that this book will probably be the best one yet. A character that's probably going to have her life changed forever from the sickness from which she came. I can not wait!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11190772361237752890noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-72720128704186786352012-07-20T07:19:03.156-07:002012-07-20T07:19:03.156-07:00Thanks for a wonderful post. As a victim of sexual...Thanks for a wonderful post. As a victim of sexual violence, I understand how BDSM can be used as a trigger or a healing act, depending on who you place your trust in. What a great article and I am totally putting Nobody's Perfect on my TBR list. :)<br /><br />Erzabet<br /><br />erzabetwrites (at) gmail dot comErzabet Bishophttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15905893177327260270noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-429156142967093682.post-65162889680529335402012-07-20T06:01:55.645-07:002012-07-20T06:01:55.645-07:00I hope Mary's chemo goes well tomorrow. My th...I hope Mary's chemo goes well tomorrow. My thoughts are with you both.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08827256707951314332noreply@blogger.com